Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders

‘Criminal Minds’ in Belize? After screening, even worse than we imagined

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Here's the proof! FBI agents on Ambergris Caye are dwarfed by the barren hillsides of the island in a scene from the "Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders" episode "Love Interrupted."
Here’s the proof! FBI agents on Ambergris Caye are dwarfed by the barren hillsides of the island in a scene from the “Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders” episode “Love Interrupted.”

On a balmy Friday night a couple dozen expats gathered beside the lagoon here on Ambergris Caye for an outdoors screening of this week’s episode of the spin-off CBS show “Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders.”

Since its original TV airing on Wednesday, expats and Belizeans all over this tiny country have been convulsed in paroxysms of laughter. To be honest, some have been convulsed in paroxysms of rage.

This week, the elite FBI team lead by a heavily botoxed Gary Sinese drops into Belize to find a young American honeymoon couple who have gone two days without posting anything on social media, thus raising suspicions of foul play.

Let me say this: We all know Hollywood makes stuff up. That is what they do. That is their job and we mostly appreciate it.

But, seriously? Read the rest of this entry »

“Criminal Minds” episode in Belize? It was just criminal

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"De Los Inocentes" (Left-right) Clara Seger (Alana De La Garza),Mae Jarvis (Annie Funke) and Matt Simmons (Daniel Henney), Unit Chief Jack Garrett (Gary Sinise), comprise the International Response Unit, the FBI division at the heart of the upcoming drama series, CRIMINAL MINDS: BEYOND BORDERS, which premieres Wednesday, March 16 (10:00-11:00 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network. The IRT is tasked with solving crimes and coming to the rescue of Americans who find themselves in danger while abroad.
“Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders” team in action:  (Left-right) Clara Seger (Alana De La Garza), Mae Jarvis (Annie Funke) and Matt Simmons (Daniel Henney), Unit Chief Jack Garrett (Gary Sinise). They are called the  FBI International Response Unit and they prefer running around in big black SUV’s while operating discretely in foreign countries. Driving golf carts on Ambergris Caye probably would not have worked for them in last night’s non-Belize-based episode.

My first inkling that the CBS series “Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders” dabbles in geographic bullshit was the network press release last week that touted Wednesday’s episode “Love Interrupted” taking place on the island of Belize.

It seems an American couple honeymooning on this mythical island is abducted and the FBI’s highly specialized foreign troubleshooting and extraction team drives to Ambergris Caye from the International Airport to rescue them.

Yeah, you read that right.

Drives to Ambergris Caye. Read the rest of this entry »